Disappointed

Are all men plain self-centred or is it just me that meet self-centred men all my life? with the kind of man my father is, to the kind of man my boyfriend - potential husband. Disappointment is all i can hold in my head, and what i feel in my heart right now. A leopard never changes its spots no matter how much you try to convince yourself that it would change. I've seen the hard truth, with all these people adding more day by day. everything when first considerations are made is MYSELF. Seriously, when i want to talk something else, first topic is always themselves. TIRED, CAR SPOIL, FML.... then they remember about the other party.

this makes me wonder if they truly love you or just wanting to keep a relationship going on. Seriously, in the past, he would fight to fetch me to and fro anywhere everywhere, even though he did not have a car, he wouldn't mind doing that extra things just to ensure my safety.. but now? seriously... i have to plead with him to fetch me from a convenient spot for him. HE WOULDN'T GO ALL THE WAY FOR ME. and he complains his mood is bad. for god's sake, whose mood isn't bad? he's tired i'm tired too. he has no money, even more so me... but when i received my gst voucher, i was still thinking of sharing this with him. I think i should not bother.

he's tired and he goes to slp, he thinks he has done his part by preparing the shower, preparing my bottle, and what massaging me thinking i'm tired? pls. i don't need all these when the person doesn't know my heart or even understand me. I'm upset, i'm disappointed, i'm just... sad.

But at the end of the day, i can only blame myself for making the wrong choices in life.

and for him, i guess it's the same. perhaps one day we will come to a decision that this should stop, and seriously, i think life would be much more easier for me. i don't need a partner, i just need someone who communicates - listening 80% talk 20% and understands 95% of me most of the time. not the superficial kind of understanding.